Being alone isn't lonely , I tell myself , Being on my own isn' t horrid, I tell myself , For all this world is done , is hurt my inner self made me lie and tried to shape into someone else Stripped down my pride and made me doubt all my steps , You're a little child , without any sense they said , Think not, so highly of yourself , For you can't change the world , With your little words they said . Sanjana Singh Yadav
As my exams ended today , I decide to do something fun . I started off by writing a list of topics . I created a blog . All of this so that I could pursue my hearts desire – writing .
But now that I have created a blog, set aside a time and made up my mind to write . I don’t want to write . It has suddenly started feeling like a drudgery. I’d rather watch you tube or surf on the net. This is the same sequence of events that take place every time I think of picking up a hobby .
I always think of picking up a hobby when my exams start. During this time I’m forced to stop procrastinating and study for long hours . The result – I start contemplating about life. I soon come to the conclusion that all my life I’ll study , get a job, work all my life and that would be it . No excitement , no joy. As I keep thinking on this line, I end up at a dead end with the simple answer that life has no meaning
Usually at this stage my mom notices that something is wrong with me and talks to me about it . She tries to comfort me by telling me her own life story and that her key to happiness is me .This knocks some sense into me and I try to find some joy in life .
My answer to this meaningless abyss is pursuing a hobby . This is what brought me here. But right now it feel like too much work .